Live!

Let's all remember to take the time to LIVE!!!!

A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package:

'This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package.'

He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.

'She got this the first time we went to New York , 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on, was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothing he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died. He turned to me and said:

'Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion'.

I still think those words changed my life.

Now I read more and clean less.

I sit on the porch without worrying about anything.

I spend more time with my family, and less at work.

I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through. I no longer keep anything. I use crystal glasses every day... I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if i feel like it.

I don't save my special perfume for special occasions, I use it whenever I want to. The words 'Someday...' and ' One Day...' are fading away from my dictionary. If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now.. I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can tell. I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends. She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels. I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favourite food. It's these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come.<>

Each day, each hour, each minute, is special. Live for today, for tomorrow is promised to no-one.

If you got this, it's because someone cares for you and because, probably, there's someone you care about.

If you're too busy to send this out to other people and you say to yourself that you will send it' One of these days' , remember that 'One day' is far away... or might never come....

No matter if you're superstitious or not, spend some time reading it. It holds useful messages for the soul.

Don't keep this message.

To My ever-loving MOM

Myspace Happy Birthday Comments & Graphics

Don't want to go back yet

Back to school again tomorrow... I still want to rest, and sleep and just do nothing...

Haizt!

Moving Away

My Best friend and his family will move out today. I'll surely miss him. Yet, nothing will change, he'll forever be my best friend here on earth and in heaven.

Take care, Best! God bless!

1st day of Practicum

I was overwhelmed with the number of special students I mingled today. So tired. I need rest for tomorrow's day. Lord give me strength and patience to endure everything!

Happy Chinese New Year

Myspace Christmas Graphics

What's wrong with me?

I feel that I'm losing my mind. I just can't think right at the moment and I feel that everything I do seems not right. I hate feeling this way. I abhor it. I have already shared my pent-up feelings with a friend of mine in the office yet I'm still not okay. I have not yet overcome the feeling. I feel that I need to find where my keys are. I feel that I need to put this into writing-- maybe, I pray that it would help.

Yesterday, right after taking a bath at around 4:30 pm, I received a phone call from Ms. Cherry (Hone's boss) and she interrogated me, "What's your message for Myke?" I had nowhere to find answers to her question. I might have freeze to death without answering her query. I was speechless. I knew that it wasn't only her listening to my voice, I knew that something's up... it's a phone patch. I was stuttering beyond words. That moment--- words run out of my lips and out of the parts of my brain. I didn't know what I was saying. I remember, I just said, "He already has everything and I just love him." When I hung up. I knew that I messed up. I kept thinking what went wrong with the words that I uttered. Then, two rides after, I realized that I wasn't able to say the two most simple words that I shouldv'e said which are: Happy and Birthday. Shoot.

Realizing my stupidity. Where did my head's neurons went? Okay, let me rationalize. First reason, Honestly, I felt like I was greeting Michael for almost 3 days. Considering that I work on a night shift, I have waited for his day to strike at 12am- that was the 1st, he even fetch me at around 5am. When I was about to go to work in the evening, we were about meet (which did not materialize) so I kept greeting him through text- that's the 2nd. When he picked me up the following morning on the 21st, that was the third day... and I felt like he was so devastated with the number of times I've greeted him before he left to work. You know, it just felt like I've said it a million times and to greet him over and over again, it's really too much. Second reason, everybody in that room who have heard my voice surely knew that it was his birthday, so it's granted- what I've said was for his birthday anyway. Third reason, I wasn't really prepared. I just came from the bathroom when I've answered the phone and I'm all wet with my towel on, dripping drops of water on floor and on the ear piece of the phone. They didn't know what I was up that time. So it sucks! Okay, enough with rationalizing... as Raph said, "it still boils down you missing two significant words--- Happy and Birthday." Alrightie then, enough! I'm only human. And I... have already felt bad. So is Destiny already happy with my situation?

I was out of bounce. I noticed that it has been for 3 consecutive days. Maybe it's because of the bad interview that I had with the Director of the school which I'll have my practicum soon. Followed by me texting my previous Grad School professor, addressing her the wrong name. But hey, I should get over those things. It's over. I won't cry over spilled milk. What I need to do is to keep the ball rolling. I should be back on the game.

Okay, once I've published this entry, I'm really over with my frustration in the interview, which was core of all these mishaps and out of bounces. Anyway, our professor would be formally endorsing us tomorrow. That would be the closure. That would be the end. And I will have a whole month vacation from work, away from computers and members and stuff in the office.

Oh God, help me!

To My One and Only HONE

Graphics for Happy Birthday Comments

Bondage

The topic for our Cell group (Single women's group) is that if we are still bonded into certain things in life. Bondage is something like being in prison without seeing bars. It's like wanting to get out of a maze but you can't. Janet said, "We should free ourselves and just leave everything to God." So the question was posted, "Are you free from bondage?"

Ouch! I am not. Though, I have given God the pains in my heart, I feel that I am still inside the invisible bars of prison, boxed with hatred for particular people who have stabbed me and who I have killed in my mind. Of course I want to get out of this feeling but it takes a zillion courage to really forgive and forget. Wounds heal but it leaves marks. I don't know the way out of the maze 'coz I'm unable to see the top view of it. I'm inside the maze.

I don't know when I can get out of it and when I can really forgive those who have done me wrong. Maybe oneday, maybe someday. At the moment, I just leave it to the hands of God.

You Are the One

Artist: Lincoln Brewster
Album: Amazed
Title: You Are the One

You're the One Who made the heavens
You're the One Who shaped the earth
You're the One Who formed my heart
Long before my birth
I believe You'll always lead me
All my days have been ordained
All Your thoughts toward me are holy
Full of love and grace

You are the One You are holy
You are the One You are worthy
You are the One You are the One everlasting
You are the One

You are the One I will worship
You are the One I will serve all my days
You are the One You are the one everlasting

You are the One
Jesus You're the One